Thursday, January 21, 2021

Democracy Can't Die

 

Well, we made it, well some of us made it. Too many died. Too many have been made to suffer. And we are starting where we left off, bringing that same energy of Biden running down the halls cheering that marriage equality became the law of the land. A more perfect union.

 

The racist terrorist thought they could overturn democracy by breaking windows for the gram, but the broken windows theory has been proven to be bs. Democracy doesn’t lie in a building, burn it down, it won’t matter. It will hurt, it will horrific, but it won’t kill democracy. If anything, it will make it stronger, as it has. Democracy is these cracker terrorists on no-fly lists, going to jail, losing their jobs, families and friends. Democracy don’t die, we multiply. We the people. Not what the founders intended, but what we tend in our hearts – the love of one another.

 

Even these mayonnaise Bettys. Their ignorance is so infuriating, because it goes against their own self-interest. They are hurting themselves and that in turn hurts us because we love them too. You most certainly don’t like a motherfucker. But you do love them. That is if you haven’t bought into white supremacy or capitalism (same/same btw).

 



 

Sunday, January 17, 2021

Little Bits' Loud Bits

 

I hope that like most people Little Bits will experience the joys and sorrows of life in stride, yet so far I’m not sure if this will be true. Sure she can be sweet agreeable courageous and kind, and much of the time she is not. She is a stubborn flighty cantankerous B much of the time, much like me. We all hopefully want our offspring to be better than us, and she, but there is so much turd parts of me in her that the shit thrown back at us covers the family in a foul stench.

 

Us: hey you have 5 minutes left then it is time to get offline

LB: okay

Us: it’s been 5 minutes time to get off

LB: okay, one moment

Us: it’s been 3 more minutes

LB: okay, one moment

Us: No, it’s time

LB: I know I’m stupid! you think I’m stupid! (throws device) why don’t you want me to have any friends! I’m sorry you hate me!

Us: None of this is true

LB: yes it is! you hate me! you think I’m stupid! (starts shivering like we pulled out a switch) sorry, sorry, sorry, sorry, sorry …

 

This goes on for the 20 minutes or so, something shifts her attention for a moment, then she acts as if it never happened. Can even ask her about it, and she probably won’t remember.

 

This happens several times a day. And low and behold, sheltering in place is not helping. The collective trauma that world is experiencing will need space and time to heal. And although we have adults in the room now, it may be too late to ever get out of shelter in place. Anti-vaccers with anti-democracy will kill us all. The revolution may not be televised but the fall will. 

 


 

Friday, January 15, 2021

Nag the Twitch

 

Sat down to write this morning. It’s later now. Was nagged into cleaning passively – I guess I’ll have to clean because I’ll have to ask you too many times to do it. Do you got receipts? Have you run the data analysis? Damn. Seriously. Responds I’m just talking out loud. But why does it feel that I’m being undercut and you play the role of the martyr? We clean. She’s annoyed, I know because she is whistling to herself.

 

I pout too. As I hold it in my nose twitches. Not my whole nose. Just the strip where breathe strips go. The twitch is more an irregular bounce. It happens more and more, the burying of emotions into twitchy muscles. Healthy outlets are few. Unhealthy options are plenty. Options, not outlets. Options keeps burying, ignoring, and isolating the truth. Guess the twitch is the truth wanting to get out, but I’m too caught up in my feelings for that.

 


 

Thursday, January 14, 2021

The Age of the Moderate is Over

 

I’ve pretty much stop listening to the news. Never really watched it besides the PBSNewsHour anyway. Since March, since the question how are you doing now only causes existential dread, I’ve been off NPR. The two sides of the debate of how we got here, why people support Donnie Rump, or the evil that is Mitch the drip, has no place in a public forum. All of it is very clear and logical, it is racism – the pinnacle of ism, where all other isms flow from and too.

 

This morning NPR reported that security officials missed the insurrection by white supremist because they just didn’t believe this violent crowd directed by Rumpy would actual be violent. Huh, why is that? Why did they so readily believe that peaceful Black Lives Matter protesters would turn violent? Racism 101. Instead of calling it what it is NPR reported that it was a simple bias error, a blind spot if you will. No I won’t. This is despicable and dangerous reporting. This disavows the deep, violent racism in these officers (over-seers), in law, in American democracy.

 

Even before alt right, it was just the right, including most moderate lefts, and much of the left at that that held up and continues to hold up imperialist white-supremacist capitalist patriarchal values (thank you bell hooks). The alt-right are not necessarily radical, as logical. If your society preaches these values, they are simply following them to the logical conclusion. Why doesn’t this happen to everybody then. I hope that it is critical thinking, I hope that love is prevailing, I hope that 10 commandments etched on our hearts is enough of a compass to bypass man made ideas of power. We must be extreme in our love. I may not like you, but I love you.

 

Maybe we spend too much time liking and not loving. Too much time on the surface and not enough time with the core. Too much time wanting to be liked and not enough time loving ourselves. And since I am breathing and you are breathing and we are still breathing Caesar’s last gasp – to love ourselves is to love existence completely. This love requires action and is painful. This love requires to call out imperialist white-supremacist capitalist patriarchal values as anti-love, anti-existence, anti-you and me.

 


 

Wednesday, January 13, 2021

So I'm trying to write every now

I’ve spent the last month trying to find something new because I’m unemployed once again. As a part-time community college instructor who has not risen to the height of full-time instructor, our classes and our income can be cut for under enrollment. Every period I am assigned classes, re-employment preference of some sort (more like torture at this point), yet up to 2 weeks before class those classes can be cancelled. This time the news came the week of Christmas followed by several well wishes to enjoy the break. So happy holidays you broke bitches?

To get out of this unstable cycle of never knowing if I am going to work, if I going to have income, if I can make future plans, I have tried to look for other work. Shift careers I suppose. I’ve applied for well over 50 jobs in the past year and none have called back. So fuck it.

Now I’m going to do what I do, write, think, talk, listen to records. I am going to promote myself. I so deeply desire validation, often allowing people devalue how I value myself, leading to depressive entrapment. Allowing grumpy trolls to infect my value. I won’t say no more, but I will say validation is internal. So bye dirt on my shoulders, bye linkedin, and hello me I guess.

 

 

Tuesday, January 12, 2021

40ish and Cantankerous

When I was a teen I told people that I wanted to be bum, and by the time I entered college, I thought I would be dead by 23. No reason, just couldn’t see or imagine my future. 23 came and went and the future seemed possible simply because everyone I knew was broke and still waiting to make real moves, or so I thought. 

 

Mediocrity is my operating system. Being white, cis male in America, the definition of mediocrity, the future is not for me. Yet I’m still here, failing into the middle. The middle of success, the middle of happiness, the middle of satisfaction, the middle of life. An ineffectual contributor, despised by many, loathed by more. I know, stories we tell are stories not truth, but I haven’t found any other story. I’ve tried to make moves and all lead to no, so what story am I left with but this.

 

We’ll try again tomorrow cuz that damn sun keeps coming. 

 


 

Wednesday, May 3, 2017

Code Meshing as an Act of Liberation

What follows is a paper I wrote while in grad school last year. I would like to publish/present this more formal someday - any feedback will be greatly appreciated.

In this paper I want to explore the current conversation concerning code meshing. To adequately do this, I will first place the debate in its historical context starting with previous notions of code switching to the present criticism of code meshing. The subtext of these conversations is that code switching ask people to practice Standard English. It is also asking them to join White, Middle-class Discourse (I’m using Gee’s notion of Discourse with a capital D here and through out much of the essay). Therefore SE is White, Middle-class English (WMCE), and code switching must be racist and hegemonic because it offers only one path to middle-class life and determines that this life is largely White. Denying those outside the barriers of WMCE access to the benefits of the middle-class is a radical departure from SRTOL (Students Right to Their Own Language) and our beliefs in diversity. Predominantly, composition instructors have agreed to the merits of SRTOL, but have also agreed that learning academic discourse is the surest pathway to academic and financial success (Bartholomae 1986, Gee 1989, Bloom 1996, White and Lowenthal 2010).
But I believe this paradigm is false because the job landscape is shifting so rapidly that academic Discourse becomes a highly specialized, and saturated, mode of communication that it is no longer needed on such a large scale. In other words, the need for academic language specifically is dead outside of the academia (and perhaps inside too). Furthermore, as economics has shown us, financial success does not guarantee long term financial success, personal growth, or happiness (McKibben 2007). The question becomes what jobs of the future are we preparing our students for, and is economic stability the main role of higher education?

History of SE and Code-Switching in Composition

In the late 1820s, Harvard noticed that their freshman needed English composition remediation because a larger pool of their applicants did not possess the written language of aristocracy. Their approach to remediation is often called the “current-tradition” method that focuses on error correction. Essentially, that there are rules that must be followed, a standardized way of writing. Even as Adam Sherman Hill in the 1870s, who was in charge of the entrance exam at Harvard, notes that the work of scholars shared similar non-Standard usage in their writing, Harvard and other universities see Standard English as a lost art (Clark 2012). Yet, Harvard’s institution of the entrance exam itself, help lead to the birth of ETS (Education Testing Service), the SATs and much of the standardized testing we have throughout education. This standardization is based on the belief that the standard exists and that it is something that can be explicitly taught. Hence, if you are told a grammar rule, given an uncontextualized example of the rule, and practice using the rule, then you will learn the rule. There is much evidence that explicit instruction, especially when concerning grammar, does not work, and that most grammar rules in English can be broken depending on context.  Therefore, what is the reason for holding such a high standard to Standard English, if it does indeed not exist?
Many instructors deal with this question by seeing their roles as gatekeepers. And I think this is a role the University is comfortable giving them. As most students do not possess the codes of academic discourse, many scholars and educators argue for teaching students to code switch, that is use their home dialect in private and Standard Academic English in public. It is believed that switching will produce academic and career success, while not requiring the student to completely neglect their home discourse. To complicate matters, Carol Severino, in “Where the Cultures of Basic Writers and Academia Intersect: Cultivating the Common Ground” (1992), argues that as members of the institution and gatekeepers to its privileges, we often see our freshman students, especially our basic writers, as belonging to a deficient literacy community. However, she believes this is a false assumption. In fact many of our “under prepared” students have very complex and multiple literacies before they enter our classroom. She stresses that it is our job to build common ground with those literacies so that students can build a bridge to go back and forth between their home literacies (maybe even combine) with their growing academic literacies. Still switching, but with a nod to meshing.
            In full celebration of students’ home discourse, Peter Elbow often runs the other direction and ask his students not to code switch at all. Elbow and other expressivists believe that code switching is a skill that students are not ready for yet, and that it will be picked up naturally as the student progresses through their major. Instead, they believe that students must learn to work metacognitively in their home discourse first. Expressivists do understand that adopting to the codes of academia is inevitable.  For example, Lynn Bloom notes that Freshman Composition is setting students on the road to middle class livelihoods by teaching how to code switch (Bloom 1996). It is in this moment Bloom is linking financial success with Standard English, and instead of instructors being the gatekeeper; it is the language itself that keeps students in and out.
The constructivist, David Bartholomae, makes no bones about it, he believes we, as composition educators, must teach our students to be academics, or at least to act like one. In his seminal article, “Inventing the University” (1986), he addresses the need for students to enter the dominant discourse of privilege in order to receive said privileges. Use of what Bartholomae refers to as “common” language or codes, are most often what deny people access to discourse communities of privilege. The student who uses “common” language cannot infer different meanings, nor can he find the nuance in his own discourse. The arguments that come out of such students are often moralistic and egotistic. Students fall back on this language and these arguments because their deep identification with the “common” language (Bartholomae does note that all discourse communities have common language, but he is using quotes to indicate non-privileged language). Still many students can grasp this new academic discourse community through what Bartholomae calls “imitation or parody,” or rather learn to code switch.
James Paul Gee builds upon Bartholomae’s work by trying to understand why some discourse communities thrive in the academy, while others struggle to get by (1989). He sees discourse first as primary, the discourse of the home we are born into; next is a secondary discourse of the outside world. Secondary discourse can be forever added onto but it alters, rejects, and critiques each previous discourse. By breaking down the characteristics of the changes that occur into sub categories, Gee reveals the dialectical nature of discourse communities in each individual person, as all people can be said to belong to at least two Discourses (Gee changes discourse to a proper noun to include values, costume, manners, social identity, etc.). Gee also marks the differences between learning or being taught and apprenticeship or performance. He argues that successful students have had early secondary discourse, perhaps primary discourse, which mimics academic discourse. Therefore when they enter school they don’t have to learn the rules of the discourse, they can simply practice it. On the other hand, unsuccessful students primary and secondary discourses do not share traits with academic discourse. Therefore when they enter school they are being tested on proficiency of discourse standards that they never been able to practice.  Gee stresses the need for code-switching because of the liberating nature of aquiring a secondary discourse as it will often lead to a metacognition of previous discourses. And though this may happen, Vershawn Ashanti Young argues that since the secondary discourse of academia in most cases is Standard English, many non-White, Middle-Class students will fail at acquiring it, or at least have to deny part of themselves in order to be successful in the institution.
To Code Switch is to Divide the Self
            Young points to W.E.B. DuBois and his notion of double consciousness to ground his argument in the need to code switch has always been known to minoritized people. It’s similar to when Talib Kweli emotes one of the reasons the receiver of his affection is a “Hot Thing,” he raps, “I love the way your crib smell like Votivo candle incense/The white voice you use on the phone when you handle business” (Green 2007). Or rather as Du Bois proffers, African-Americans are always part of at least two consciousnesses that quite often force the holder to practice cognitive dissonance, like using a “white voice...[to] handle business.” A Black person in America must be fully conscious, that is versed in the codes of the white man’s Discourse as well as their own, in order to be accepted and generally survive in both worlds. This is code switching, and where much of the ideology, I believe, resides why we still focus on teaching students to code switch. Part of the belief is that discourses and identities are not intersectional, nor are their exigencies. By keeping rigid lines between discourses, we essentially burn the bridge to ever go home. Which is a very violent act. Which is why Du Bois calls for a merging of identities, and latter Young calls for merging of discourses.
            Academic writing is important and can serve as a growth point for students to explore other avenues, but by allowing students to apprentice in blending their home language with a emerging academic language, hence practice code meshing, will allow for growth of an authentic self. In other words, that the language they write in should reflect where they are from and where their education is taking them (White and Ali-Khan 2013). By asking students to keep their identity separate and place a hierarchy on them, we are asking students to deny a part of themselves in the name of capitalism.
Furthermore, those outside of White, middle-class Discourse are often held to a higher level of scrutiny in towing the line laid out by the Discourse than those inside it. In other words, Black people are held to higher standards in regards to speaking and writing Standard English, even as Whites are not held to the same standard or are expected to know the standard. A Black colleague, Beth (not her real name), told me a story when she was working in a different industry and her boss accused Beth of not using SE on a report. The boss told Beth that she understood that Beth spoke a different language but she needed to be more careful in the future. At the time, Beth was working on her third Masters degree and had a more than proficient grasp of SE, but she simply made a mistake and was accused of forgetting to code switch. Though anecdotal, it does illustrate how SE is not only used to put Black people in their place, it is also a power move, because the boss was employing the function of white man’s guilt by first pitying Beth, then by stating she understood Beth’s culture and language, which also tells Beth which culture she belongs to, denying her the ability to define it for her self.
As Young argues, Standard English itself is a myth, which is further supported by Lippi-Green in her book English with an Accent (1997). It is here that Lippi-Green explains how even as lexicographers acknowledge that learned people pronounce and scribe in different manner, they still maintain that there is such a thing as Standard English that is most widely used by learned Americans. What lexicographers forget to add, though Lippi-Green spends considerable time explaining, is that the variations used by learned Americans also reflect their social, economic, and ethnic affiliation and that those that affiliate closest to White, Middle-class standards, also speak and write in Standard English. So instead of Standard English being a standard that is organic or natural or correct, it is yet another tool that is used by educators to whitewash language, and therefore identity. And by instructing students to code switch to Standard English we are telling them that speaking and writing as a White, middle-class person is the only path to success in academia. As June Jordan’s students discovered, you can speak in your own dialect and be true to yourself knowing that your message will not get across, or you can adopted the language of your oppressor which alters the message for the oppressors sensibilities (Jordan 1988). Either way you have failed.
             In the face of the binary options that fail to fulfill our needs, Victor Villanueva (2006) makes the case that code meshing might be the close the subaltern comes to speaking. As he asserts, “an international blending of dialects…is more than simply a great concept; it is right; it is some assertion of the subaltern speaking. But before code meshing could work…outside the English classroom, we would have to educate an awful lot of educators. We’ve been trying for over forty years now, but some notion of “proper English” continues to hold sway” (Villanueva 2016).  This is akin to when I told White colleague about the merits of code meshing, and she said it sounded great but a lot of teachers are “gonna have to die first.” But that is only part of the problem as many new and continuing instructors hold steadfast to grammar conventions and an idealized notion of SE. I believe much of this is due to having spent so much time being educated in SE that we end up telling our students essentially that they have to learn the rules of SE to understand how to break them in the future. Which in of itself is a crazy notion: that we must apprentice (Bartholomae 1986) in academic Discourse (Gee 1989) in order to gain entrance into the academe, that which is the gatekeeper for the power bloc, so that we may make changes from within. If this is the story we tell our students, and the story that was most likely told to us, then we are forever kicking the proverbial can of radical progression down the road.

What does code meshing look like?

            To combat this cyclical gatekeeping paradigm code meshing honors the necessity of rhetorical exigency to dictate choice, but it also honors the right to choice and hence SRTOL. One of the ways code meshing can be accomplished in the writing classroom, and other classrooms that demand writing, is to provide students with assessments that require them to use multiple voices interwoven together. For example, in my first year composition course I have my students read Joe Sacco’s non-fiction, graphic-novel, Palestine (1996), because it is an honest portrayal about a subject most of my students are unfamiliar with and curious about. I pair this reading with the Part I of Edward Said’s “Introduction” to Orientalism (1978). Students often comment how moved intellectually and emotionally they are by delving into such tense subject matter. Therefore, I have created an assignment that asks students to write passionately about what they have learned. One part is analytical, academic English, and the other is more personal self-reflection. However, both styles require the student to use their intellectual growth and emotional growth as grounding points for composition. This weaving, perhaps differentiated by italics, is what we see most often by professional writers; yet often deny as a means of expression to our remedial writers. I too have been guilty of this in not allowing students to use personal voice when writing, or saying that an argument is too conversational. But when we do this, we are telling students that the most truthful honest part of them is not acceptable for public consumption. Code-meshing does not accept this and presses that no discourse is better than another, yet all have merits unique and shared.
            Moving beyond the English classroom, code meshing seems most akin to learning communities and their program of support and accountability. What is special about learning communities as it relates to code meshing is that learning communities acculturate a small group of students into academic Discourse in multiple disciplines simultaneously. And since self-reflection and group sharing are often part of the learning community experience, this group of students will practice communicating with each other with their home, natural language, along with the discipline specific discourses they are acquiring. Even if the assignments don’t ask them to code mesh, their natural conversations will be exhibiting code-meshing qualities. Therefore, if educators within learning communities incorporated more assignments that asked students to code mesh, which they are already doing naturally, maybe we would have fewer at risk students and more successful students. Not merely financial success, but self-fulfilled civic liberation.  
           

Work Cited
Bartholomae, David. “Inventing the University.” Journal of Basic Writing. 5.1 (1986): 4-23.

Bloom, Lynn Z.. “Freshman Composition as a Middle-class Enterprise”. College English 58.6 (1996): 654–675.

Clark, Irene L. “Processes.” Concepts in Composition: Theory and Practice in Teaching of Writing, 2nd ed. New York: Routledge (2012).

Gee, James Paul. “Literacy, Discourse, and Linguistics: Introduction.” Journal of Education. 171.1 (1989): 5-25.

Green, Talib Kweli. “Hot Thing.” Eardrum (2007).

Jordan, June. “Nobody Mean More to Me Than You And the Future Life of Willie Jordan.” Hardvard Education Review. (Fall 1988).

Lippi-Green, Rosina. English with an Accent: Language, Ideology, and Discrimination in the United States. New York: Routledge (2012).

McKibben, Bill. Deep Economy: The Wealth of Communities and the Durible Future. Henry Holt and Company (2007).

Severino, Carol. “WHERE THE CULTURES OF BASIC WRITERS AND ACADEMIA INTERSECT: CULTIVATING THE COMMON GROUND”. Journal of Basic Writing 11.1 (1992): 4–15.

Villanueva, Victor. “Subversive Complicity and Basic Writing Across the Curriculum.” Journal of Basic Writing 32.1 (2003): 97-110.

WHITE, JOHN W., and CAROLYNE ALI-KHAN. "The Role Of Academic Discourse In Minority Students' Academic Assimilation." American Secondary Education 42.1 (2013): 24-42. Academic Search Complete. Web. 26 Feb. 2016.

White, John Wesley, and Patrick R. Lowenthal. "Minority College Students And Tacit "Codes Of Power": Developing Academic Discourses And Identities." Review Of Higher Education 34.2 (2010): 283-318. Academic Search Complete. Web. 26 Feb. 2016.

Young, Vershawn Ashanti. “Nah We Straight”: An Argument Against Code Switching.” JAC 29.1-2 (2009): 49-76.